Yeh been less crap on the other threads...oh wait.

Yeah

So, what is the best kite in 2012 ?

8 pages of nothing this thread should be in the gear review section

Guess I'd better join in, we can get this to 10 pages easily

What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?

They do have eye lashes when they are very young!

kitebored said...

joshy0184 said...
Soooooo what I want to know is.. Has anyone figured out how long it takes to cook the elephant??? Using African swallows...

Well based on alverstone's work and wikipedia it would take the energy equivalent of 20,754,500 European swallows to cook an average African Elephant (7,750 kg). Of course the average Asian Elephant at 5,400kg would need 14,461,200 European swallows.

Regarding African Swallows, I assume you are referring to the South African Swallow 'Hirundo Spilodera'. They weigh in at an average of 20 grams where as the European swallow averages at 20.3 grams (5 ounces), giving us 20,447,783 African swallows for an African Elephant and 14,247,488 African swallows for the Asian Elephant.

Not sure why I had to bother writing this, it's obvious really.


References

alverstone said...

It takes the energy equivilent of burning 5,356 European swallows to cook a 2kg leg of lamb, once you have removed all the eels from your hovercraft.

Wikipedia...
The African Elephant is the largest land animal, with males standing 3.2 metres or 10 ft to 4 metres or 13 ft at the shoulder. They weigh around 3,500 kilograms up to a reported 12,000 kilograms. The female is smaller, standing about 3 metres or 9.8 ft at the shoulder.

Asian Elephants are not as large as their African cousins but can weigh around 5,400 kg and stand over 3.4 m or 11 ft tall

My equation, plagarised from an Ethiopian mystic wearing boardshorts outside of his wetsuit, is based on the 'energy-equivilent', or the amount of potential carlories that are in all of a swallow - bones, feathers, organs and flesh. A lot of a bird's energy is going to be wasted as light and sparks when you burn it. On reflection, it is obvious that for this theory to work, and to have the lamb roast just right and 'pink' on the inside, the energy-equivilent has to be measured form swallows that are fat, pre-migration birds before long weeks of flight over any continent make them thin and tired enough to stumble around on their stumpy legs near waterholes or villages and become a quick Ethiopian snack with a mere snatch of the hand. You can use the beak as a toothpick afterwards, apparently.

alverstone said...

kitebored said...

joshy0184 said...
Soooooo what I want to know is.. Has anyone figured out how long it takes to cook the elephant??? Using African swallows...

Well based on alverstone's work and wikipedia it would take the energy equivalent of 20,754,500 European swallows to cook an average African Elephant (7,750 kg). Of course the average Asian Elephant at 5,400kg would need 14,461,200 European swallows.

Regarding African Swallows, I assume you are referring to the South African Swallow 'Hirundo Spilodera'. They weigh in at an average of 20 grams where as the European swallow averages at 20.3 grams (5 ounces), giving us 20,447,783 African swallows for an African Elephant and 14,247,488 African swallows for the Asian Elephant.

Not sure why I had to bother writing this, it's obvious really.


References

alverstone said...

It takes the energy equivilent of burning 5,356 European swallows to cook a 2kg leg of lamb, once you have removed all the eels from your hovercraft.

Wikipedia...
The African Elephant is the largest land animal, with males standing 3.2 metres or 10 ft to 4 metres or 13 ft at the shoulder. They weigh around 3,500 kilograms up to a reported 12,000 kilograms. The female is smaller, standing about 3 metres or 9.8 ft at the shoulder.

Asian Elephants are not as large as their African cousins but can weigh around 5,400 kg and stand over 3.4 m or 11 ft tall

My equation, plagarised from an Ethiopian mystic wearing boardshorts outside of his wetsuit, is based on the 'energy-equivilent', or the amount of potential carlories that are in all of a swallow - bones, feathers, organs and flesh. A lot of a bird's energy is going to be wasted as light and sparks when you burn it. On reflection, it is obvious that for this theory to work, and to have the lamb roast just right and 'pink' on the inside, the energy-equivilent has to be measured form swallows that are fat, pre-migration birds before long weeks of flight over any continent make them thin and tired enough to stumble around on their stumpy legs near waterholes or villages and become a quick Ethiopian snack with a mere snatch of the hand. You can use the beak as a toothpick afterwards, apparently.

But we're talking about cooking the elephant, not lamb, so how do I get the elephant pink on the inside?

Kitepower Australia said...

62Davo said...

They do have eye lashes when they are very young!

What do they taste like though and do you oven finish them or just deep fry them?

Thats just sick! How can bring the value of this thread down so much? Eating baby birds - I ask you "whats this neighbourhood coming too?"

LostDog said...




Some contributers to this thread doubt that we will hit 10 pages...
Epic Doubter!

About the roasting of the elephant - anyone have any good ideas how to ensure the tusks are nice and soft, yet still a bit moist?

Steam them.

Should this topic be moved to the Gear Reviews section?

and for those who haven't seen this one:

why is it the more mull cookies i eat the hungrier i get?

LOOKING SURPRISED must be a bitch

Puetz said...

Kitepower Australia said...

Puetz said...

Kitepower Australia said...

Juddy said...

Kitepower Australia said...

Has anyone seen where I put the sauce bottle?

I've got chili, tomato & BBQ sauce...which one do you want?

Chilli please

Also please note that baby seagulls do not have eyebrows...

... but if they don't have eyebrows,,, how will you know if they are angry???

This guy is seething with anger just after this photo was taken it pecked out the eyes of 10 bystanders, true story.

... and 'cause he has no eyebrows, you just can't see it, man he can pull off the perfect crime and get away with it!!!!