poor rellie. second best. Is that cos he's got smelly armpits Liz?

The Ballad of Liz n Pat

Rellies heart belongs to Lilly,
Thats kinda sad but true.
So Liz and Pat are free as birds
To do what birds will do.
And Rellie's Lizzie's backup
If Patrick wont come through
But Rellie's Greenpat's buddy
Sorry Liz, it simply wouldn't do
He's bound by the cruel "Unsaid Rule"
Mates ex's cant be screwed.


Did I just mention cruelty
Yes I think I did
For sheer egregious cruelty
Fate is hard to beat
And cruel fate has played a hand
To turn this humble tale
From one of love n hope n joy
To one of tragic pain
For love is blind n stupid too
As all the wise men say
N love n lust n honey words
Will steal your brains away
Well all the stars of love aligned
And Cupid did his best
But Liz lives on the East of Oz
And Pat lives on the West


Yes Pat lives on the West of Oz
And Liz lives on the East
And love is hard to consumate
From four thousand kilo-metres
So they write in secret beige
Of secret lovers things
Of boards and kites and windy days
And the tensile strength of strings
And fantasies of love abound
To haunt their turgid dreams
They pine their lonely lives away
Tortured lonely beings


Eight hundred leagues at least apart
It may as well be parsecs
For East is East and West is West
N they're like opposite directions
Yes East is East and West is West
And ner the twain shall meet
Cos Pat live on the West of Oz
And LIz lives on the East.

wow, Shakespeare eat ur heart out. NotWal for me. My tummy hurts from laughing so much (or the 3 hours on the water yesterday).

There was a young man called NotWal
Who couldn't decide between a kite or a pole
He went kiting instead
and to his shear dread
Got dragged under the sand like a mole

aaahhhhh NotWal... I luvv ur work... Always love ur work! U know that haha

But PAT!!! U cry before bed!!!!! tsk tsk tsk! I can't even remember the last time I cried! LOL [}:)][}:)][}:)]

Shame on you mate!

lol xoxox

No surprises there. You're a good lookin woman. (I'm assuming that's you in your avatar not your daughter). However I'd hold out for a real one. Concrete's statuesque for sure but its a bit cold and unyielding. Makes a good mooring though.

NotWal said...

No surprises there. You're a good lookin woman. (I'm assuming that's you in your avatar not your daughter). However I'd hold out for a real one. Concrete's statuesque for sure but its a bit cold and unyielding. Makes a good mooring though.

Tis me to be sure. define real one.

NotWal said...

thinks ...hmmm... sees invitation to describe self... stops... no, my identity must remain a secret... comes up with clever plan...

Ahem. I have to go and vote.

What a lame excuse NotWal

I expected more from you

Susie said...

me too. Like a poem or something.

u are gorgeous susie! Im with NotWal on this haha. =P I know his identity *does identity dance-muhaha it shall stay my secret too!*

Everyone has fallen for ur poetry Wal! Told u they would.... Whisk the woman off their feet

So susie, I'm itching to know....did you go out with the concrete man???

NotWal said...

Yes, and did you find out why they call him that?

Sorry I took so long. I voted below the line.
For you Susie - a poem to sweep you off your feet (as my life coach Liz suggested)

Real Men

Real men are real MEN like lumberjacks n such
Firemen can fill the bill they’re macho and they’re tough
Then theres lots and lots of middlin blokes like lawyers, drones n clerks
Who are macho on the weekend when they take to hunting ducks

Hairdressers rarely are nor airline stewards either
Scout leaders are suspect as are men who sing in choirs
Men who dance in ballet or any art requiring tights
Absolutely definitely fail to qualify

Real men can hardly talk and barely read and write
They bite the heads of vermin and they really like a fight
They are unaware of fashion. They smell of sweat and beer
They like a joke. They like their sport. They like to fart and swear

Yes REAL men have endearing traits like these and many more
You really have to wonder what women want them for
Yes you really have to wonder what goes on in women's heads
We’re all a bunch of ****ers but some are good in bed

haha Wal I can't take credit as ur lfe coach =P lol what an honorary role!

Love ur work again, but its put me of males times ten. haha.

elizabethb said...



haha Wal I can't take credit as ur lfe coach =P lol what an honorary role!

Well I could offer you a small honorarium Liz but what about your reputation? and then there's the contact, the fairness test etc. I couldn't do the time and half for overtime thing and forget about acouchment leave. My local member advised me to forget about the contract. With the fairness test I'm better off sticking to the award rates. Jesus I'm tearin my hair out here. What am I gunna do for a life coach now?...

2009 is going to come early I think. If its not here before January I'll be surprised.

surfinchick said...

So susie, I'm itching to know....did you go out with the concrete man???

I'm back! Just had two precious days off. And I got in the water so I am feeling happy. The answer is.....HELL NO! He's at least ten years younger than me probably more, and more importantly HE DOESN'T WINDSURF. He gave me his card and said ring me ANYTIME. ... yer right. I'm sure he's a nice guy, I was kind, it must be hard asking a girl out.
.....Anyway I have no heart.

Ha Ha NotWal. Great poem. You were very restrained.

I wrote a poem once. I'll share it with you when I find it. Its about a secret (ha ha no such thing) surfing spot.
Susie

NotWal said...

No heart indeed. You could have at least gone out with him and maybe gone to bed with him once or twice and maybe married him and had a couple of kids. Its the least you could have.

I'm speechless You sure know how to shut a woman up NotWal!!! And my tummy hurts again from rolling around the floor. Every time my boss walks in he looks at me strangely...that'll teach him for lining up the concrete man...yeah.