Post your fav BBQ feasts.


Still my all time fav is some nicely frenched lamb cutlets wel salted with a touch of rosemary and char grilled on the coals.

Love a big fat cattleman cutlet well salted and cooked on the Webber. Fire up the coals then throw some wetted hickory chips on top just st as you are about to put the meat on. Put the lid on and keep the top vents closed but the bottom ones opened half way. Give it approx 5-7 mins depending on how thick it is - then hurriedly lift the top and turn her over and replace the top. Give it a couple of
Mins then lift the lid and monitor the last bit making sure
You leave plenty of cooking left for when it's resting. Wrap her in tin foil for 5 mins and get ready to enjoy.

Wow half the BBQ ing world fell over in fear when they read your cooking style lol

Just thought I would start off lightly before getting too technical . Not all of us are professionals

Better include some etiquette too...
(You blokes just reminded me of this Breeze post from a couple of summers ago... yeah , a bit long, but i broke it up in to short pars. Hope that helps ...)

The Tongmaster.... Steve was at the barbecue and Jeff was at the barbecue and I was at the barbecue; three men standing around a barbecue, sipping beer, staring at sausages, rolling them backwards and forwards, never leaving them alone.

We didn't know why we were at the barbecue; we were just drawn there like moths to a flame. The barbecue was a powerful gravitational force, a man-magnet.

Jeff said the thin ones could use a turn, I said, "yeah I reckon the thin ones could use a turn", Steve said, "yeah they really need a turn" - it was a unanimous turning decision.

Steve was the Tong-master, a true artist, he gave a couple of practice snaps of his long silver tongs, SNAP, SNAP, before moving in, prodding, teasing, and with an elegant flick of his wrist, rolling them onto their little backs. A lesser tong-man would've flicked too hard; the sausages would've gone full circle, back to where they started. Nice, I remarked. The others nodded.

Kevin was passing us, he heard the siren song sizzle of the snags, the barbecue was calling, beckoning, Kevinmmm ...come. He stuck his head in and said, "any room?" We nodded and began the barbecue shuffle; Steve shuffled to the left, Jeff shuffled to the left, I shuffled to the left, Kevin slipped in beside me, we sipped our beer.

Now there were four of us staring at sausages, and Steve gave me the nod, my cue. I was second-in-command, and I had to take the raw sausages out of the plastic bag and lay them on the barbecue; not too close together, not too far apart, curl them into each other's bodies like lovers -fat ones, thin ones, herbed and continental.

Gary came along, he said, "looking good, looking good" -the irresistible lure of the barbecue had pulled him in too. We nodded and did the BBQ shuffle, left, left, left, left, he slipped in beside Kevin, we sipped our beer. Five men, lots of sausages.

Jeff was the Fork-pronger; he had the fork that pronged the tough hides of the Bavarian bratwursts and he showed lots of promise. Stabbing away eagerly, leaving perfect little vampire holes up and down the casing. Gary was shaking his head, he said, "I reckon they cook better if you don't poke them".

There was a long silence, you could have heard a chipolata drop; this newcomer was a rabble-rouser, bringing in his crazy ideas from outside. He didn't understand the hierarchy; first the Tong-master, then the sausage-layer, then the Fork-pronger -and everyone below was just a watcher. Maybe eventually they'll move up the ladder, but for now - don't rock the Weber.

Steve handed me his tongs. I looked at him and he nodded. I knew what was happening, I'd waited a long time for this moment - the abdication. The tongs weighed heavy in my hands, firm in my grip - was I ready for the responsibility? I snapped them twice, before moving in, prodding, teasing, and with an elegant flick of my wrist, rolling them back onto their little bellies.

I was a natural, I was the TONG-MASTER ... Until Steve got back from the toilet....

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Ted the Kiwi said...
Just thought I would start off lightly before getting too technical . Not all of us are professionals

I have done what you have done ted

Here's is my cattlemen cook.

Get the kamodo to 125c with a golf ball chunk of peach wood (use a small chunk ,it is way better than wetting chips for anything)

I will vacuum seal my meat for a few hours with (standard beef seasoning) then the REVERSE SEAR STARTS ( look it up people and do it...)on the coals until it hits my desired internal temp.

Then it is straight on the hibachi for a super hot seal about a minute each side

The perfect cattlemen steak ....i prefer the name axe steak

I lived in the crayfish capital of West Oz for 9 years & used to have a boat. I'd fill up a spare freezer with crayfish for the year & BBQ was the go.

I'd cook them with butter & garlic, sealing the cut first & then charr the other side...bloody good stuff

Special Vat Snag ....... whole in case - slit into Butterfly carefully while half-frozen so it stays in shape .... lightly drizzle a combination of Sesame Oil (go easy on this stuff it's more powerful than Peta Credlin's undies) , Balsamic & Olive Oil onto a reasonably hot grill ...... cook until golden crust forms then place above heat or to very edge of plate to slowly cook in it's own juices ...... if there's any left by the time it hits the table , ice cold beer is the go ..... if the girl is around then a salad is the go .....

Roast Piglet Portion in Kamodo ...... get the chunk of beast out the night before & marinade in Olive Oil , Sesame Oil , Fresh rough crushed Garlic , Herbs that you may have lying in wait , Parsley , Basil etc - morning of the deed , slit into side of Pigchunk , stuff as much of the herb mixture deep into piggy boy then sew it up with a couple of satay sticks no stress ..... Kammy temp up to round 250 & vents pretty much shut just trickling in ..... bung a few chips of Hickory chips presoaked in water til dampish ..... chuck pigboy in , grab the Red Sea Salt threash the bastard out of it on Piglad & baste with what oil / herb mixture left over ...... grab a skewer after an hour per kg and check for blood you know the caper ..... mmmmmm Piglet

Beer Mandatory

reverse sear - so thats the name the funky hipsters give it these days. Been a well passed on technique for a long time in these parts Ribs always done best in a reverse kinda way

This burning animals is bad Karma dudes Like yeah man like I grab a thinly sliced tofu strip and gently rub it on my ball sack then marinate it in aged yaks milk and lay it on a bed of fermented cabbage leaves and slowly cook it elevated above recycled mahogany shavings on a bamboo spatula while performing tree pose in a pair of calico budgie smugglers turning every 20 seconds to tibetan prayer bells.OMG Nirvana

MMMMMMMM Roast Nirvanaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Smoked Beef Brisket and Pulled Pork

Both recipes pretty much the same...you can skip the 24hrs in brine for the Beef

Remove outer fat
Select dry rub
Rub that delicious meat with that rub...do not rub your other meat as the spices will leave you with a red dick
Let meat rest for 1hr
Put some spice mix and you meat in an airtight container and cover with a slat water brine
Refrigerate for 12-24hrs
Get you over up to temp ( I use a outdoor pizza over and like to get it up to around 200C for the start of the cook...mine falls pretty quick so you may want to adjust this depending on size of oven/meat)
Remove meat from brine
Pat dry with kitchen towel
Rub your meat again with some delicious spice
Place meat in oven
at this stage I usually throw some apple food and hickory if its chiops I will soak it in water or bourbon over night)
Close oven
Open oven after 2 hrs and remove meat
Wrap meat in foil
Return to oven for another 4 - 9 hrs depending on meat size (check internel temp every 1hr)
Remove meat from oven and rest for 1hr
Pull apart and serve


Home made BBQ sauce and Spice rub recipe to follow

Boned pork leg.

On the previous night, score the skin and pour boiling water over the scoring. This renders the fat and makes it easier for the salt rub. Poke some sprigs of rosemary in the scoring.

Rub in the salt, much like you would rub baby oil into your lady friend's inner thigh. Put the whole thing in the fridge with a tea towel loose over the top.

Calculate the weight and work out when you want to eat, count back from then. A 3 kilo roast will take 3 hours 45mins, plus resting. The Weber will take an hour to get up to temp.

Take the pork out of the fridge when you light the weber. Allow the hour for it to come up to room temp .

Light the Weber and leave the lid off, put a tray of water on the bottom grill and have the coals around the outside, not directly under the roast.

When the Weber coals are fully alight, put the roast on the top rack, put the lid on and leave the vents fully open for 45 mins. This will bring the crackling up, but NEVER LIFT THE LID. At the 45 min mark, close the vents just 1/3 and leave it until it's time to remove it. If you're worried about it, use a torch to look through the vent, but NEVER lift the lid until you're ready to take it off.

Rest it under breathable cloth so the crackling doesn't go soggy. If you like pork a little under done shorten the time, but the general rule is about an hour per kilo. High heat for the first 45 or so, then medium heat to finish.

A variation would be to remove the crackling once done and put it aside, then slow the kettle down by closing the vents almost completely and cooking for 5 hours to give you pulled pork.... not my style, I can't grow a man bun and don't like kale smoothies.....

Buy heat probes and never have your food cooked wrong ever again.

No guess just perfectly cooked food

Pffffft BBQ hipsters

Rub

Adjust amounts for your taste/type of meat

Brown Sugar
Salt
Chilli Powder
Ground Cummin
Dried Oregano
Onion Powder
Garlic Powder
Smoked paprika
Garlic
Diced onions

The rubs good for chicken/pork/beef just bang what you don't use in an airtight container for next time

BBQ Sauce

Sugar
Malt Vinegar
Cinnamon
Chillipowder
Mustard Powder
Tomato Sauce
Dijon
Bourbon - lots
Onion
Tomato
Bay Leaves
Cummin
Paprika
Chilli
Orange juice
Orange Rind

Put it all in saucepan and heat/reduce till you get it right

Salad on the side - don't shoot me - but chicks dig this stuff

Watermelon, feta, 2 tsp baby capers, mint leaves, 1 tbsp sumac, 2 tbsp lemon juice, 1 tbsp olive oil. Mix together and serve - delicious ! !

The Ultimate Brethren's Guide in regard to the Provenance of Beer .......

1. All Beer must be afforded the minimum 210 minutes chill time in an operable Fridge.
2. The Beer must be Hipster-n-****ter-free certified & absolutely none of that half-strength watery Cats Piss.
3. Bring extra rations with you - 85% certainty old Fabian Five-Fingers the Beer pirate will be up to the usual.
4. The use of Glasses is frowned upon - if you're too softcocked to drink out of that magnificient stub go home champion , bake some Scones or something.
5. When ya go to get another fresh one , avoid the Dog just in case he decides to hump your leg , avoid the girl in case you get your sorry arse roped into Salad duties , or worse Salad duties with her Mum , go straight to the Fridge & pass GO ....... advance to PiccaBeer Square ........ take the one at the back in case some sneaky funny Bastard has shaken one up front
6. Once you have your Beer in hand .... well nothing else matters a fark the caper is accomplished .....
7. Retrace steps back to Meatside seat ..... this comes in particularly handy later in the evening when yer starting to get a bit smashed.
8. Grab Esky from chariot at some stage - put some rations in (with Ice) ..... essential for later on when it's too hard to walk to Fridge ..... prevents totally unpredicted "Staggers into Gardens" & the dreaded pavement Falcon.
9. For Fark's sake make sure you don't burn the Steak ..... slabs of charcoal ruin good beer.


mmmmmmmmm geez making me think of a feed of Chilli Mud Crab for farks sake goes great on a BBQ

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thePup said..
The Ultimate Brethren's Guide in regard to the Provenance of Beer .......

1. All Beer must be afforded the minimum 210 minutes chill time in an operable Fridge.
2. The Beer must be Hipster-n-****ter-free certified & absolutely none of that half-strength watery Cats Piss.
3. Bring extra rations with you - 85% certainty old Fabian Five-Fingers the Beer pirate will be up to the usual.
4. The use of Glasses is frowned upon - if you're too softcocked to drink out of that magnificient stub go home champion , bake some Scones or something.
5. When ya go to get another fresh one , avoid the Dog just in case he decides to hump your leg , avoid the girl in case you get your sorry arse roped into Salad duties , or worse Salad duties with her Mum , go straight to the Fridge & pass GO ....... advance to PiccaBeer Square ........ take the one at the back in case some sneaky funny Bastard has shaken one up front
6. Once you have your Beer in hand .... well nothing else matters a fark the caper is accomplished .....
7. Retrace steps back to Meatside seat ..... this comes in particularly handy later in the evening when yer starting to get a bit smashed.
8. Grab Esky from chariot at some stage - put some rations in (with Ice) ..... essential for later on when it's too hard to walk to Fridge ..... prevents totally unpredicted "Staggers into Gardens" & the dreaded pavement Falcon.
9. For Fark's sake make sure you don't burn the Steak ..... slabs of charcoal ruin good beer.


mmmmmmmmm geez making me think of a feed of Chilli Mud Crab for farks sake goes great on a BBQ

I can't wait until I go to one of your Beer /BBQ's Pup

Think we might have to keep reviving this one from time to time mate hahahaha the big Autumn trip will require some cooking at some stage got a couple of ideas in mind already mmmmmm Chilli Bug Tails

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thePup said..
Think we might have to keep reviving this one from time to time mate hahahaha the big Autumn trip will require some cooking at some stage got a couple of ideas in mind already mmmmmm Chilli Bug Tails

Yeah,bloody oath mate,Autumn trip I'm in,bad back or not F@$k it i'll be there,"photographer come Ted and V's beer bitch come beer taster come story teller come food eater" haha will be cool

Amateurs

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Ted the Kiwi said..
Salad on the side - don't shoot me - but chicks dig this stuff

Watermelon, feta, 2 tsp baby capers, mint leaves, 1 tbsp sumac, 2 tbsp lemon juice, 1 tbsp olive oil. Mix together and serve - delicious ! !

Ted, the best salad is a prawn salad.... that way you get some protein as well.

Take a kilo of cooked kingies or tigers. No farkin tales either. Leaving tails on prawns in salad or stir fry is for hipsters.
Get two oranges and squeeze em, mix that in with 300ml of greek natural yoghurt.
Cut up any kind of greens you like, such as baby spinach, iceberg, what ever.
Slice two really big mangos into bitesize bits.
A small red onion sliced real thin.
Couple of shallots chopped up.

Toss all the salad together, gently pour (notice I didn't say drizzle - cos it isn't a real word) the yoghurt over the salad, then chuck it away and eat the prawns by 'emselves......

Or, if you're sheila is around, lay the prawns over the top of the salad, then gently pour some of the orange/yoghurt mix over them and the salad and enjoy it with your lamb cutlets.

If I eat prawns MR I will throw up - allergic to them So not the best salad for me - but the lady would love that one

My Mrs took over the BBQ cooking about 3 years ago.
As long as she's got a glass of chardy or beer in her hand it's all good.

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NewScotty said..
My Mrs took over the BBQ cooking about 3 years ago.
As long as she's got a glass of chardy or beer in her hand it's all good.

Hand in your man card bro

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Tux said..

NewScotty said..
My Mrs took over the BBQ cooking about 3 years ago.
As long as she's got a glass of chardy or beer in her hand it's all good.

Hand in your man card bro

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Tux said...

NewScotty said..
My Mrs took over the BBQ cooking about 3 years ago.
As long as she's got a glass of chardy or beer in her hand it's all good.

Hand in your man card bro

I get that but f-Uck it - it's still cooking.

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NewScotty said...

Tux said...

NewScotty said..
My Mrs took over the BBQ cooking about 3 years ago.
As long as she's got a glass of chardy or beer in her hand it's all good.

Hand in your man card bro

I get that but f-Uck it - it's still cooking.

No scotty...you are smarter than this....

You should have just let that ball of gold slide by to the keeper mate

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NewScotty said..

Tux said...

NewScotty said..
My Mrs took over the BBQ cooking about 3 years ago.
As long as she's got a glass of chardy or beer in her hand it's all good.

Hand in your man card bro

I get that but f-Uck it - it's still cooking.

Does that mean you are doing all the cleaning now Scotty?

Bit like a lot of married blokes...

His wife tells him when his meat is getting turned...

Although i reckon there might be the occasional BBQ alone when she is out....

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SP said..
Bit like a lot of married blokes...

His wife tells him when his meat is getting turned...

Although i reckon there might be the occasional BBQ alone when she is out....

It's all good ..... there may very well be a silver lining in the caper ..... does she serve the beer as well ..... he might be onto a superb lurk here