Perhaps now that "dubya" has been put out to pasture there is a dearth of prominent people who can completely butcher the English language. Perhaps I should salute those bold kiters who are stepping up to the plate. On the other hand there are times when I truly squirm at the borderline literacy on these dear seabreeze pages. Therefore, in the spirit of a constructive response, and rather than refer people to dictionaries, (yes, well-spotted, I have been reading Proust lately, though my sentences are as yet nothing compared with his whole-page dazzlers) I've composed a few sentences to contextualise and clarify distinctions between some of the words that are regularly confounded in these forums. I hope they help.

Look, over there, they're pumping up their kites.

Yes, the show-off knew the local rules, he was definitely behaving defiantly.

As the bridal party's carriage arrived at the church, the horse's bridle snapped, as it had been made in China with inferior components.

He thought it was a waste to throw out his waist harness just because the colour was no longer fashionable.

If you brake gently, you're less likely to break your wine glasses, which you always take to Altona.

His sail was for sale, and he was bored with his board; poor poley.

Butt seresly, tha wavs are gunner bee fooly sikh tumurra sa i hafter git reddy, yers no wot i meen. skewl sux!

Hapy kitten, Dojo

Djdojo,

a kindred spirit...the seemingly frightening link between kiting & illiteracy is amazing. whilst the flames are going to be coming thick & fast I've got a brand new fire extinguisher to cover your back...

to add to your list:

where is my rashie? I'd like to wear it when I go kiting tomorrow afternoon...

Juddy

djdojo

Are you by any chance a fellow teacher!? [}:)]

mate, i'd be more worried about what some people are actually trying to get across; the spelling mistakes in comparison reduce to nothing.

So that I can keep up with the times, could someone please tell me the meaning of the abbreviatios lmao and imo? Oh my god I`ve only just realised what omg means. It means "only me girls" right?
Seriously. I get all these messages on facebook etc and I don`t have a clue.
Well I do know one and I think alot of people should learn it and that is HTFU.

How do you spell TOSSER !!

djdojo said...

Well, an underground literati springeth forth.

Ahh Mr. Dojo, your underground does go deep underground. I have it on good authority that even one of the forum moderators is a seeker of improved literacy skills. His protestations were, unfortunately, muzzled in favour of a greater good. Underground, however, I believe you still have his full support.

The fat cat sat on the mat and screamed "me yeps gud enquish speekn gwama" NO umpossiable

I think the major concern now is generation x using mobile phones and jargon
I have a friend who is a school teacher and she sees children writing stories in english language in abriviated txt format 20th century english

is this the new short had do we rlly av time for abrives or ful stopskis
cyah l8rs m8 bbs lullzzz'
'text messages' destroying literacy across the globe

Look, over there, they're pumping up their kites.
"check that **** out"

[/s]Yes, the show-off knew the local rules, he was definitely behaving defiantly.

"Yes",he was a show of ****head and is being a TOSSER

As the bridal party's carriage arrived at the church, the horse's bridle snapped, as it had been made in China with inferior components.

^the chinese **** was Munted

[s]He thought it was a waste to throw out his waist harness just because the colour was no longer fashionable.

^the colour was like the scene out of a 1970s porn movie but he still refrained from chuckin the harness out

Butt seresly, tha wavs are gunner bee fooly sik 2moz sa i have2 git redski, yers no wot i meen. skewl sux!

There is only one thing worse than being talked about on the internet, and that is not being talked about on the internet.

So divisive an issue too. Who would have thunk it?

On a more serious note, even though it's been outnumbered by the polysyllabic responses on this thread, the regimen known as "htfu" does seem popular. I know so little about it, I wonder if anybody can suggest a good book on the subject? I am ever so curious. Does it really involve the daily consumption of cement and the sacrificing of one's vocabulary at the local altar of conformist masculinity, or are these just nasty urban myths?

I SECONT THAT ITS NOT GRAMAR SCHOL FOR GODS SAKE.

djdojo said...

If we shadows have offended,
Think but this, and all is mended,
That you have but slumber'd here
While these visions did appear.
And this weak and idle theme,
No more yielding but a dream,
Gentles, do not reprehend:
if you pardon, we will mend:
And, as I am an honest Puck,
If we have unearned luck
Now to 'scape the serpent's tongue,
We will make amends ere long;
Else the Puck a liar call;
So, good night unto you all.
Give me your hands, if we be friends,
And Robin shall restore amends.

I think you want the Dead Poets Society.
This is Seabreeze. The only thing we wax here are surfboards.

imo= In my opinion
lmao=Laugh my ass off
I've never really understood what a donkey has to do with that one...

My, don't they bite! Yet the field seems evenly split on the issue.

I wonder whether Surfingboye's withdrawal of his earlier post was: a gentlemanly concession to the diversity of opinion that this thread has teased out; a broader, paradigmatic change of heart; a realisation that he'd shot himself in the foot by failing to use a question mark even though the question was rhetorical; or perhaps a temporary withdrawal whilst he rethinks his strategy? Come on old chap, gimme sumpin to work with with which to work. You may be flattered to know it was your poetic post here www.seabreeze.com.au/forums/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=48653 that tipped me over the edge and inspired this thread.

Coastflyer, reliance on spellcheck only increases the misuse of correctly spelled words. A spellchecker will not tell you the difference between "losing your grip" and "loosen your grip."

GreenPat said...

poor relative said...

Its simple improved spelling and proper punctuation add credibility to your posts.

Literature is a dying art preserved by those over 30.

Yet you still missed two punctuation marks in your first sentence. I would have just slipped in and fixed it with my awesome moderator powers, but since you have thick skin I thought I would take you to task over the second instead. I am not yet 30, your generalisation is inaccurate sir!

NNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRDDDDDD

Last year I couldn't spell mechanic, now I is one!

Who gives a **** if people cant spell or key in what they want. The important thing about forums is that we can all comunicate and get the information and advice we require. To exclude or shame people that cant spell and make them feel uncomfortable to put in there 2 cents worth will ultimatly make this forum ****ed

See if you can find that in the dictionary..

Regards your illiterate friend and fellow kiter Waxy