WELCOME TO TPA ... (Terrorist-Proof Airlines)
TPA is in the safe-flying business!
We can absolutely guarantee no walk-on
GUNS, KNIVES, SHOE-BOMBS, SUICIDE-BELTS
or other weapons will EVER be carried onto our flights!
Book your next flight with TPA ..
The SAFEST airline in the flying industry...
And… if a Muslim
sees a naked woman he is obliged to commit suicide...
So you're perfectly safe with us!
We need passengers!