This thread is dedicated to the Channel 7 News team in QLD because they could not tell the difference between a windsurfer and a kite. They did identify the large wave behind the windsurfer and never mentioned anything about snow or motorbikes so not all was bad. With respect though, we need to consider all the jargon we use and understand. For the lay person it could all be gobblygook or even have a different meaning. So to clean up the confusion I am going to identify some of the common terms we use and give them an altered meaning, just to show how confusing it is with all the words we use. Here goes...

Outhaul - strong current taking you out to sea
Downhaul - carrying all your gear along the beach
Planing - 'shaving' just a few thousandths of a second off your time for a nautical mile
Skinny dipping - catapulting with your new RDM carbon mast.
Boom - noise heard when hitting the water after a catapult
Luff - the name of a V8 Supercar driver
Leech - the name of a former ironman great
Gale - the name of a West Indian cricketer
Extension - extra time given by your Uni lecturer to go windsurfing
Fin - something that makes it easier to locate sharks
Freerace - something you and your mates do to get back to the beach when you see a fin in the water
Raceboard - a type of board only used by racists and rednecks
GPS - giant planing shark
Vest - something you wear on the water to look better dressed than the kiters
Wind - gas produced in the lower part of your torso
Onshore - the place you wait for stronger wind
Offshore - the place you go when the wind is strong
Jibing - dunno? Must be a musical term
Tacking - hitting in some nails with a hammer
Harness - something they used to attach to toddlers so they did not run off (and go windsurfing)

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MarkSSC said..
This thread is dedicated to the Channel 7 News team in QLD because they could not tell the difference between a windsurfer and a kite. They did identify the large wave behind the windsurfer and never mentioned anything about snow or motorbikes so not all was bad. With respect though, we need to consider all the jargon we use and understand. For the lay person it could all be gobblygook or even have a different meaning. So to clean up the confusion I am going to identify some of the common terms we use and give them an altered meaning, just to show how confusing it is with all the words we use. Here goes...

Outhaul - strong current taking you out to sea
Downhaul - carrying all your gear along the beach
Planing - 'shaving' just a few thousandths of a second off your time for a nautical mile
Skinny dipping - catapulting with your new RDM carbon mast.
Boom - noise heard when hitting the water after a catapult
Luff - the name of a V8 Supercar driver
Leech - the name of a former ironman great
Gale - the name of a West Indian cricketer
Extension - extra time given by your Uni lecturer to go windsurfing
Fin - something that makes it easier to locate sharks
Freerace - something you and your mates do to get back to the beach when you see a fin in the water
Raceboard - a type of board only used by racists and rednecks
GPS - giant planing shark
Vest - something you wear on the water to look better dressed than the kiters
Wind - gas produced in the lower part of your torso
Onshore - the place you wait for stronger wind
Offshore - the place you go when the wind is strong
Jibing - dunno? Must be a musical term
Tacking - hitting in some nails with a hammer
Harness - something they used to attach to toddlers so they did not run off (and go windsurfing)

fa..k I've got 2 of them..
Top stuff! No wind up there? ( says she..)

Clew - don't have one........

Very good but

Gale : Megan. What's cricket?

Fin: water depth testing device




I'd add

Footstrap: device for twisting ankles just as the season gets good

How about?

Windsurfers - bored farts that mostly just write cr*p on SB forums (I'm one )

speed sailing,

hitting the water after a line with a mate.

Jibing- the friendly rivalry exchanged between those who 'windsurf' with a kite-like thinggy and those who don't

Slalom - The shape of a front row forward's nose
Footstraps - useful for giving birth
Mast - Old fellow at attention
Mast base - the short and curlies
Monofilm - non stereo movie
Freestyle - A development of the Australian crawl
Port - produces headache when drunk too much
Swell - aspiration of the old fellow
Chop - a cut of lamb
Non skid - clean undies

Downhaul: you need more

Green Arrow: The holy symbol

Elmo's wave

Equates to

Danger danger, Unco muppet on the wave soon to be trying to water start in the impact zone, do not use him for a speed hump or gybe marker


arrrrrrrrrggghhhhhhImmmmgunnadie....speed run through chop
Ouch that hurt.....after the speed run through chop
Blind faith....sailing with your eyes closed over rocks based on the philsphy "that if you cant see it, you cant hit it"
Bloody GPS..... thinking you've done a 40knot run only to find it's 27knots
F'ken Boats......sailing the Mandurah estuary over the Christmas holidays
F'ken Crabnets.... outnumber the Christmas bats by 100:1 everyone seems t have at least 1.5km spare rope floating on the surface.
Elmo's curse......designed to greatly reduce the number of d'heads in boats on the Mandurah estuary over the Christmas break.

Fin screw: The crew that fins.

Vent screw: The crew that hangs about on forums on windless days and vents.

Non-skid: The marks that aren’t skid marks.

Fin box: Genitals like a Fin.

Starboard: Rent that stars pay.

Uni: What you skip to go sailing.

Double sandwich: Big lunch

Sail - what we hope to get on Gumtree!

Board - expression on families faces on the beach when I'm out sailing!

Quads - good comedy but didn't last long

Thruster - bloke with special skills

Foot pads - for really big ladies

Sail. Tricky term to make you think it is cheap

Quiver - that feeling you get after buying more sails.
duck jibe - a sudden turn when you see a duck standing in shallow water.
catapult - double somersault dismount.
boom - that thing that hits your ribs after a catapult.
nose - the part of your face that hits the board after a catapult.
mast - trying to say the word "fast" after smashing your teeth out on the nose after a double somersault dismount.
tail - lying about what happened.

****. Couldn't you idiots see that perfect planing gybe.
****. That was easily 40 plus knots, morons.
****. Why cant these wankers see how fast Im going?
****. Dickheads, why do I sail with these tossers?
****. You passed me?? in your dreams numbnuts!!
****. Conservationists, piss me off in the pond and Ill show you angry!
Poo bum dick wee. I cant sail today, Ive left "something" at home.

Powerbox = type of sub woofer
Two piece mast = type of jazz band
Mast track = type of song done in a recording studio
Its smoking = looks like you need a new motor

Sailboarders = Poll dancers
Kiters = Tea bagers

Body drag......a technical bus surfing term

Upwind.....When you hang onto a fart

Downwind.......When you let it go

Walk of shame.......When you follow through

Guru Screw: Laird Hamilton ... ?


...Opens some wine!

Go Pro ; Taking up Prostitution

Goiter = that big ugly thing that needs to be removed from your neck

Polakow - Australia's highest measurement of awesomeness!

Sheet in ....... the can
Sheet out ....... feel much better

Epoxy - bad skin

BOARD> What I am now cos there is no wind

Spin out - under the influence of too many drug's

Prebent.. before you meet a crazy woman