Sorry, but I can top all of these...
One of my mates, yes i do have em

, who's a GUN shortboarder is surfing this island reef/point break somewhere out in the Solomon Islands when an innocuous wipeout turned very VERY nasty... He goes down ass first, to which a perfectly placed coral spike pierced his rectum... yes... thats right, PIERCED HIS RECTUM!!! he had to be air lifted to the mainland and then was flown to Brisbane to sow it up and protect against infection... We found out via some pics of which I wont share due to their freaking disgusting nature... I couldn't help but laugh till I cried, fortunately our boy is bullet proof and has an amazing sense of humor. And then, incredibly, 4 months later he ran 3hrs04Mins in the GC Marathon, and was gutted at not breaking 3hrs... he's a freak and a bloody legend!!!

This is the pic his Niece drew for him, you get the picture:
"Uncle G@#$ with seaweed, rocks and an anchor in his butt when he fell off his surfboard"