Firstly, I'll need to apologise about the lack of any references to stand up paddle boarding in this story. By way of compensation, I'll try to avoid any mention of longboards.

Been have'n a of trouble with the old lug'ols for a couple of months now, they get water in them that simply will not go away unless I do an impersonation of a heavy metal fan. Ear plugs are not an option for me because of my genetic hearing loss, they simply make my sense of balance even worse than it already is and the loss of a further 25bd from base loss of up to 50% in the right ear, can make things quite dangerous if I don't know what's going on around me.

I tried the Dr Google solutions involving Metho and Vinegar, but they did not help and because of my hearing loss and the need for me to wear hearing aids, I've always been acutely aware of keeping the outer ear as clean as possible, within reason (ear wax performs a number of very important functions).

The situation came to a head about 3 days ago when I simply could not make my left ear work properly, something was wrong in there and it was not clearing so yesterday I went down to the local butcher shop, oops, sorry, I meant Medical Centre (I wonder why they have chairs in the surgery, you're never in a consultation for long enough to sit down) but it was far too crowded for me to waste my day waiting for a Doctor (and I use the term loosely) to give a cursory look with the otoscope, prescribe me a couple of drops of this or that and then say “next please”.

Not too far from my house is a doctor's surgery that I've never used, to be perfectly frank, it looks pretty daggy, It's just an old house that's not too well maintained, but it was open and it did not look as if there was anyone waiting so I thought, “well, it's not like I dieing of cancer, what could go wrong?”.

Turned out to be a good decision because although he looked to be well past his use by date, he actually took the time to take me into his surgery, (which looked just as crusty as him and the rest of the house) put some special drops in my ears and syringe them both.

The stuff that came out was not dark, it was almost pure white but it was like flicking a switch, my ear came good immediately, but the biggest difference was noticed this morning when I went for a surf on my longboard (oops, my bad, I promised I would not mention Longboards, don't worry, I try to make mention of stand up paddle boards a bit later), no matter how often my head went under, as soon as I came up, the ears would just drain of water immediately.

So that got me thinking, why ear plug? So I searched for images of the outer ear and almost every image indicated that there would be a natural tendency for water to drain away from your eardrum. Not only that, the eardrum itself is sloped downwards to further lessen the incidence of water sitting on it. Something like exostosis could adversely affect its ability to drain naturally, but I definitely don't have any surfers ear, so I can only guess that my incessant cleaning had the result of pushing a dam of wax in front of the eardrum, thus preventing natural draining.





Next time it happens I'll know where to go.

This water in the ear problem is probably not as bad for people who ride stand up paddle boards because they have their heads above water for a lot of the time (there you go, now everyone's happy)

I had my left ear drilled out a few years back. I guess the left ear makes sense being a goofy footer.It wouldnt drain at all because of the bone growth so I guess you're lucky you dont have it. The op wasnt a big deal either but I was out of the water for 6 weeks.

be careful with the syringing OB ,not that hard to blow your eardrum!
After having both ears drilled twice each ,(twenty years apart),when i had surfers ear i found the best way to unclog your ear was this stuff,didn't sting but reacted with the wax in your ears and liquefied it so it would drain out with whatever water was trapped!
involved lying on your side on the lounge/floor for a few minutes but none of us are immune to that,carbamide peroxide was the active ingredient ,saved my sanity quite a few times , nothing like wet squelching noise in your ears for a couple of weeks to drive you slowly insane
http://www.yourchemistshop.com.au/ear-clear-for-wax-removal-12-ml.html?CAWELAID=1216697169&cagpspn=pla&gclid=CNm3_aD6u7QCFWs8pgodr08A1g

On advice from the quack, I'm now using that same brand, but not that same type.

Mine's called "Swimmers Ear".

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obct said...
On advice from the quack, I'm now using that same brand, but not that same type.

Mine's called "Swimmers Ear".

swimmers ear is an alcohol based drying agent great to remove the water but if you need to get rid of wax then the other stuff dissolves the wax ,i used to find that the alcohol based stuff would cause my ear canal to close completely off before i had the surgery as it would irritate the already inflammed ear canal and would sting quite a bit.
Fine if you don't have the bone growths but if its blocked with wax and water the carbamide peroxide will do a fizz in your ear then run out ,one of the most satisfying feelings, next to catching/having your wife stuck in a compromising position in the doggie door

Hydrogen peroxide does the same job and it sounds and feels really cool as it fizzes away inside your head.

could have been a rare case of 'grumby old mal riders ear'.

most cases lead to suffers only hearing what they want too hear.

side affects include low tolerance to 666's

have good one all

as I previously mentioned, I don't want to get rid of ear wax altogether, but you do raise an interesting point in that none of these products should sting. The alcohol based products will make your ears warm because of the evaporation effect, but they should never sting.

If they do sting, stop using them and get yourself to a quack because it's a sign that you could have an open infection or even worse, a perforated eardrum.

And another satisfying feeling would be having my wife in the doggy position near a compromising door.

But that's not likely to happen any time soon.

wow that's no good Obs - wish you well on that - it isn't stopping you from going out though is it or won't stop you will it mate

funny thing is obct,i find when i remember my ear plugs i surf better. i seem to be more focused as my only real sense is me and the board.

You see OB, you must be really deaf mate, because I told you to get Aqua Ear months ago! You said, "yes, indeed" with a slight grin on your gob that on reflection says to me, " I have no idea what he just said, but I'll respond in the affirmative anyway..... "

Interesting the you didn't mention the previous remedy that you had with you last time we surfed together...... I'm not going to tell the green room, unless you give me permission but it was certainly both innovative and entertaining......

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MichaelR said...
I'm not going to tell the green room, unless you give me permission but it was certainly both innovative and entertaining......

no no please do

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MichaelR said...
You see OB, you must be really deaf mate, because I told you to get Aqua Ear months ago! You said, "yes, indeed" with a slight grin on your gob that on reflection says to me, " I have no idea what he just said, but I'll respond in the affirmative anyway..... "

Interesting the you didn't mention the previous remedy that you had with you last time we surfed together...... I'm not going to tell the green room, unless you give me permission but it was certainly both innovative and entertaining......

if the only response you got from me was a grin and a nod, you can bet London to a brick on, that I did not hear you.

It's just an automatic response from a deafy when you're in an environment where you know you will never be able to hear someone no matter how hard you try.

The law of averages says that a positive response is the most likely one to impart understanding, but there's been many embarrassing times in my life where it was the wrong gesture.

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chrispychru said...
funny thing is obct,i find when i remember my ear plugs i surf better. i seem to be more focused as my only real sense is me and the board.

bloody hippies ohh, every thing is so surreal man

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laceys lane said...

chrispychru said...
funny thing is obct,i find when i remember my ear plugs i surf better. i seem to be more focused as my only real sense is me and the board.

bloody hippies ohh, every thing is so surreal man

i always say piece first man.
then them dere mother****ers hear what my piece can do biatch

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chrispychru said...

laceys lane said...

chrispychru said...
funny thing is obct,i find when i remember my ear plugs i surf better. i seem to be more focused as my only real sense is me and the board.

bloody hippies ohh, every thing is so surreal man

i always say piece first man.
then them dere mother****ers hear what my piece can do biatch

I'm just drained.

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62mac said...
I'm just drained.

luck you...im still waiting for the wife

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thePup said...

MichaelR said...
I'm not going to tell the green room, unless you give me permission

no no please do

Well since you ask and OB didn't actually object..... Perhaps he didn't hear me ........ He had a plastic tube, about two feet long tied around his neck. Every time he went under the water, when he came back up, he would insert one end in his ear, the other in his mouth and suck.......... He said it didn't taste too bad, but then I'm not sure myself..... He never offered me a turn....

I'll stick to the aqua ear, thanks.........

hahahahahahahahahahaha ..... ahhhh that's pure unadulterated bloody gold MR ......

Ahhh Obs you are THE innovator .... way ahead of mere mortals such as myself

ear enema's....I hear there all the rage in Sydney