Because I was such a late starter and had so many false starts over the last 20 or so years, I’m very reluctant to give anyone advice on what they should be doing out in the water.

Yesterday I was sorely tempted to break that self imposed rule.

A learner on a mal, he was maybe 15 and could actually get up on a wave but he had absolutely no idea of how to get under or over a wave and in the process almost took my head off.

Worse still, he was outside at the bigger sets rather than inside on the easy ones.

There I was paddling out the first time and he was about 5 metres in front and to my left about 3 meters. A reasonably timid cleanup wave comes through and I made the decision to just let it tunnel past me rather than do a roll. To my horror this kid not only dives under the wave on the left side of his board, he physically throws the board as far to the right as he can and sends it hurtling towards my dental work.

I made a real quick change of plans and managed to get my ugly mug under it then came up screaming “Jesus freaking Christ, what the freak was that all about” or words to that effect.

Shocked as I was I let it go through to the keeper and thought that perhaps it was a one off.

Within a minute or two I had my first wave and was paddling back out when I saw him do the exact same thing again to a guy just in front of me and almost took his head off. As I paddled past the other victim I said to him “he couldn’t kill me so now he trying to get you”. This time I made sure the kid heard me so I added, “I think a quick lesson on how to Eskimo roll may be worthwhile”.

After that the kid moved to the inside and was a problem for someone else but I’m kicking myself for not taking just 10 seconds to show him how to turn a mal over.

I guess I didn’t do it because nobody likes to be considered opinionated, least of all me but I was pretty sure he was out there with his dad and I couldn’t work out why he wasn’t doing it.

Should I have had a word?

Select to expand quote

obct said...

Because I was such a late starter and had so many false starts over the last 20 or so years, I’m very reluctant to give anyone advice on what they should be doing out in the water.

Yesterday I was sorely tempted to break that self imposed rule.

A learner on a mal, he was maybe 15 and could actually get up on a wave but he had absolutely no idea of how to get under or over a wave and in the process almost took my head off.


Should I have had a word?

For sure you should have , the golden rule NEVER let got of your board,its one of the most dangerous things you can do in the water IMO. I have told many a learner in a nice way to hold your board. The second time you or someone else may not be as lucky.

Fair call guys I reckon, I have almost been cleaned up and back in the day got a spray when I did not know what to do and ditched my board. Certainly learnt quickly! Maybe a 2 minute tutorial may save someones dentures, if he is a local just starting out you may see him out there again.

It not just the kids who need advice. Your average middle ages surfer who's middle life crisis has made him take up surfer to stay cool have shocking surf etiquette.

LEARN the RULES

1) Never ever let go of board
2) Paddle back out in the channel or white water
3) PARTY WAVES ARE NOT FUN OR COOL. This just a nice way to put dropping in deliberately and make it sound like a good thing.
4) 5 people can't surf the same wave. Just stop paddling and take the next
5) Learn to read the swell and where to take off not just follow everyone else
6) Look inside before you and your ten "mates" take a wave and check that some poor bastard stuck in the white water is not going to get nailed when you take off on a wave you and 10 of your "mates" where never going to make.

As you can no doubt tell I was forced to surf metro in Perth this weekend due to family. I can't wait until it is freezing cold and raining then there might be a chance of a wave and not having to battle through and around a bunch of clowns.

Good on you for getting out there and giving it a go but you have to learn the rules of the road as well.

This is all true. Around this time of year I travel (an hour and a half max) to get some good less crowded waves. Metro is last option.