I had a harrowing experience at MY local on Sunday.

It was a beautiful day 1-2 foot sets rolling in. Jimmy paddled past on his 11ft 35kg log. He doesn't like to wear a leg rope, the cheeky fella, but he's cool with me. He's prone paddling the hell out of that battle tanker so that makes him heaps safer ay.

After Jimmy paddled past that's when I noticed him. A SUP foil KOOK on a 1ft wave coming right at me "SUP foil KOOK" i muttered under my breath whilst giving him my best stink eye. These guys are multiplying like flies I see so many of them every weekend when visiting MY local. Doesn't he know there is no place for him in MY ocean? He got closer and I froze as my life flashed before my saucer-sized eyes. I emptied a small portion of my bladder in to my flashbomb as an automatic instinct. Like the ink from a cephalopod. He surfed past me (within 3 metres of my board) chopping off my pinky toe in the process.

I was enraged.

I didn't bother having words with him face to face in the water- that would be way to confronting for me. I keep my tackle tucked firmly between my legs in those situations if you know what I mean. I had the perfect revenge in mind.

I flailed around on my 4ft 10L toothpick trying to catch every wave that came through without success. Finally I was able to catch an awesome ride all the way in on the white wash pumping my tooth pick the whole way to the beach, who needs a paddle? KOOKS. I hope someone caught that on vid for my instagram account.

I stopped for a coffee on the way home to calm myself down. Showed the chick behind the counter my instagram account of me catching some gnarly rides on my 4ft prone tooth pick, "I surf" i proclaimed. I made it pretty clear that I was a prone surfer and not one of those KOOK paddle surfers. She seemed pretty impressed by that as she gave me an extra shot in my caramel chai soy latte.

Back home in front of my computer and revenge will be mine SUP foil kook!

I decide to sign up and post a thread on seabreeze surf forums about how we should ban SUP foils- because that's just what Australia needs, more BANS more RULES more REGULATIONS! Whilst I'm at it we should really ban everything that's bigger than 4ft and 10L in the surf as they are a hazard and have no control of their board (maybe not jimmy he's cool and prone).

I'm not butt-hurt at all about SUPs catching more waves than me as they obviosuly haven't seen my awesome pumping action. I'm just going to blame it on them being dangerous and different. Pretty sure most of them have disabilities anyway. I mean why else would you want to paddle one of those things when you can be flailing around on a tooth pick like me catching one wave every couple of hours?

To my disapointment i find that one of my brothers had already posted about banning SUP foils in the forum.

www.seabreeze.com.au/forums/Surfing/Shortboards/Ban-the-Foil?page=1#10

Oh well, I'll be back at MY local next weekend to hand out some more stink-eye, yeah that'll teach and intimidate them SUPs and foil KOOKS! Pretty sure their numbers will be thinning soon with every stink-eye I hand out to them fools.

Laters,
P4L

nice read.

possibly the best thing i've read on this forum

Just last weekend, I witnessed an angry old fart on a long board grab and flip the board of one of our SUP crew while they were both on the same wave. Granted the SUP surfer did technically drop in but this is a party wave location that is 95% SUP, and this long boarder came from way out the back linking a wave from off the point - good for him that he managed to catch such a long ride.

My only point is this - you can't go around accusing SUPs of being big and dangerous, and then do something as potentially hazardous as flipping a 10'+ board when it is on the wave right next to you. How many ways could that board roll over and hit you hard or impale you with a fin? Karma practically demands it.

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Pr0ne4Lyfe said..
I had a harrowing experience at MY local on Sunday....

Sarcasm, the lowest form of wit. :)

"He surfed past me (within 3 metres of my board) chopping off my pinky toe in the process. "

Wow, you must have had a long pinky toe dude.


--
As long as we are banning things, lets ban all POINTY short boards - too too dangerous.

Oh hey LateStarter, I knew it was only a matter of time before I saw you in this anti-SUP thread. Seems to be the only time you contribute around here.

How's that SUP mitigation treating you bro? Always admired your profile action pics. Tell you what if I saw a bloke with guts like you coming at me I'd mitigate myself, that's for damn sure! Lucky I'm a prone pro like you and have never dropped in before. Leave that for the SUP's right?

Anyway let's keep giving it to these kooks brother!

Stay proned!

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Pr0ne4Lyfe said..
Oh hey LateStarter, I knew it was only a matter of time before I saw you in this anti-SUP thread. Seems to be the only time you contribute around here.

How's that SUP mitigation treating you bro? Always admired your profile action pics. Tell you what if I saw a bloke with guts like you coming at me I'd mitigate myself, that's for damn sure! Lucky I'm a prone pro like you and have never dropped in before. Leave that for the SUP's right?

Anyway let's keep giving it to these kooks brother!

Stay proned!

Did I hit a nerve mate?

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PTWoody said..
Just last weekend, I witnessed an angry old fart on a long board grab and flip the board of one of our SUP crew while they were both on the same wave. Granted the SUP surfer did technically drop in but this is a party wave location that is 95% SUP, and this long boarder came from way out the back linking a wave from off the point - good for him that he managed to catch such a long ride.

My only point is this - you can't go around accusing SUPs of being big and dangerous, and then do something as potentially hazardous as flipping a 10'+ board when it is on the wave right next to you. How many ways could that board roll over and hit you hard or impale you with a fin? Karma practically demands it.

So surfer flips another surfer off that blatantly dropped in after he has been up and riding for plenty of time for the other bloke to see him and you think he is in the wrong..

Therein lies the problem..

Rule 1 of surfing..

Someone on wave.. DON't EVEN PADDLE FOR IT..

Not condoning grabbing the bloke but if people can't even show the most basic and well known of courtesy / etiquette then what so you expect.. The craft is irrelevant, people attitudes is what needs to change

Select to expand quote

LateStarter said..

Pr0ne4Lyfe said..
Oh hey LateStarter, I knew it was only a matter of time before I saw you in this anti-SUP thread. Seems to be the only time you contribute around here.

How's that SUP mitigation treating you bro? Always admired your profile action pics. Tell you what if I saw a bloke with guts like you coming at me I'd mitigate myself, that's for damn sure! Lucky I'm a prone pro like you and have never dropped in before. Leave that for the SUP's right?

Anyway let's keep giving it to these kooks brother!

Stay proned!

Did I hit a nerve mate?

Dont feed the troll

Select to expand quote

PTWoody said..
Just last weekend, I witnessed an angry old fart on a long board grab and flip the board of one of our SUP crew while they were both on the same wave. Granted the SUP surfer did technically drop in but this is a party wave location that is 95% SUP, and this long boarder came from way out the back linking a wave from off the point - good for him that he managed to catch such a long ride.

My only point is this - you can't go around accusing SUPs of being big and dangerous, and then do something as potentially hazardous as flipping a 10'+ board when it is on the wave right next to you. How many ways could that board roll over and hit you hard or impale you with a fin? Karma practically demands it.

SUPpers like you to pull their heads out of their collective arses, go back to flat water paddling you tool

Laird needs a good kick in the balls.......

Select to expand quote

SP said..

PTWoody said..
Just last weekend, I witnessed an angry old fart on a long board grab and flip the board of one of our SUP crew while they were both on the same wave. Granted the SUP surfer did technically drop in but this is a party wave location that is 95% SUP, and this long boarder came from way out the back linking a wave from off the point - good for him that he managed to catch such a long ride.

My only point is this - you can't go around accusing SUPs of being big and dangerous, and then do something as potentially hazardous as flipping a 10'+ board when it is on the wave right next to you. How many ways could that board roll over and hit you hard or impale you with a fin? Karma practically demands it.

So surfer flips another surfer off that blatantly dropped in after he has been up and riding for plenty of time for the other bloke to see him and you think he is in the wrong..

Therein lies the problem..

Rule 1 of surfing..

Someone on wave.. DON't EVEN PADDLE FOR IT..

Not condoning grabbing the bloke but if people can't even show the most basic and well known of courtesy / etiquette then what so you expect.. The craft is irrelevant, people attitudes is what needs to change

Agreed.

Unfortunately some people are greedy.

ET.

Praise the Laird (again). Amen

LOL love it lets keep this on top for all the anti sup prone kooks....

They tend to hang around this forum like flies on ****...

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Pr0ne4Lyfe said..
I had a harrowing experience at MY local on Sunday.

It was a beautiful day 1-2 foot sets rolling in. Jimmy paddled past on his 11ft 35kg log. He doesn't like to wear a leg rope, the cheeky fella, but he's cool with me. He's prone paddling the hell out of that battle tanker so that makes him heaps safer ay.

After Jimmy paddled past that's when I noticed him. A SUP foil KOOK on a 1ft wave coming right at me "SUP foil KOOK" i muttered under my breath whilst giving him my best stink eye. These guys are multiplying like flies I see so many of them every weekend when visiting MY local. Doesn't he know there is no place for him in MY ocean? He got closer and I froze as my life flashed before my saucer-sized eyes. I emptied a small portion of my bladder in to my flashbomb as an automatic instinct. Like the ink from a cephalopod. He surfed past me (within 3 metres of my board) chopping off my pinky toe in the process.

I was enraged.

I didn't bother having words with him face to face in the water- that would be way to confronting for me. I keep my tackle tucked firmly between my legs in those situations if you know what I mean. I had the perfect revenge in mind.

I flailed around on my 4ft 10L toothpick trying to catch every wave that came through without success. Finally I was able to catch an awesome ride all the way in on the white wash pumping my tooth pick the whole way to the beach, who needs a paddle? KOOKS. I hope someone caught that on vid for my instagram account.

I stopped for a coffee on the way home to calm myself down. Showed the chick behind the counter my instagram account of me catching some gnarly rides on my 4ft prone tooth pick, "I surf" i proclaimed. I made it pretty clear that I was a prone surfer and not one of those KOOK paddle surfers. She seemed pretty impressed by that as she gave me an extra shot in my caramel chai soy latte.

Back home in front of my computer and revenge will be mine SUP foil kook!

I decide to sign up and post a thread on seabreeze surf forums about how we should ban SUP foils- because that's just what Australia needs, more BANS more RULES more REGULATIONS! Whilst I'm at it we should really ban everything that's bigger than 4ft and 10L in the surf as they are a hazard and have no control of their board (maybe not jimmy he's cool and prone).

I'm not butt-hurt at all about SUPs catching more waves than me as they obviosuly haven't seen my awesome pumping action. I'm just going to blame it on them being dangerous and different. Pretty sure most of them have disabilities anyway. I mean why else would you want to paddle one of those things when you can be flailing around on a tooth pick like me catching one wave every couple of hours?

To my disapointment i find that one of my brothers had already posted about banning SUP foils in the forum.

www.seabreeze.com.au/forums/Surfing/Shortboards/Ban-the-Foil?page=1#10

Oh well, I'll be back at MY local next weekend to hand out some more stink-eye, yeah that'll teach and intimidate them SUPs and foil KOOKS! Pretty sure their numbers will be thinning soon with every stink-eye I hand out to them fools.

Laters,
P4L

Hahaha, your half on the money. Ban the kooks, the dangerous out of control, the flogs dropping in and any other flog that thinks he is a pro bouncing around in the white wash. Doesn't matter if it's Sup, prone, logger, goat boater, boggie, swimmer, clubby, kiter, wind surfer or any other person in the water, if your a kook or starting out, go surf a wave suited to your level, but I'd be stoked to see a shot of your epic pro skills P4L.

Select to expand quote

SP said..

PTWoody said..
Just last weekend, I witnessed an angry old fart on a long board grab and flip the board of one of our SUP crew while they were both on the same wave. Granted the SUP surfer did technically drop in but this is a party wave location that is 95% SUP, and this long boarder came from way out the back linking a wave from off the point - good for him that he managed to catch such a long ride.

My only point is this - you can't go around accusing SUPs of being big and dangerous, and then do something as potentially hazardous as flipping a 10'+ board when it is on the wave right next to you. How many ways could that board roll over and hit you hard or impale you with a fin? Karma practically demands it.

So surfer flips another surfer off that blatantly dropped in after he has been up and riding for plenty of time for the other bloke to see him and you think he is in the wrong..

Therein lies the problem..

Rule 1 of surfing..

Someone on wave.. DON't EVEN PADDLE FOR IT..

Not condoning grabbing the bloke but if people can't even show the most basic and well known of courtesy / etiquette then what so you expect.. The craft is irrelevant, people attitudes is what needs to change

You might need to look up the word "granted". I clearly acknowledged the second guy was in the wrong. Technically. But when every wave is shared happily in this specific location, it's a bit rich trying to enforce rules that don't apply here.

Anyhow, first guy loses moral high ground relative to "danger" when he has no consideration for his own or anyone else's safety is the simple point I was making.

Select to expand quote

DARTH said..

PTWoody said..
Just last weekend, I witnessed an angry old fart on a long board grab and flip the board of one of our SUP crew while they were both on the same wave. Granted the SUP surfer did technically drop in but this is a party wave location that is 95% SUP, and this long boarder came from way out the back linking a wave from off the point - good for him that he managed to catch such a long ride.

My only point is this - you can't go around accusing SUPs of being big and dangerous, and then do something as potentially hazardous as flipping a 10'+ board when it is on the wave right next to you. How many ways could that board roll over and hit you hard or impale you with a fin? Karma practically demands it.

SUPpers like you to pull their heads out of their collective arses, go back to flat water paddling you tool

Laird needs a good kick in the balls.......

You're so cute when you talk dirty.

Select to expand quote

PTWoody said..
Just last weekend, I witnessed an angry old fart on a long board grab and flip the board of one of our SUP crew while they were both on the same wave. Granted the SUP surfer did technically drop in but this is a party wave location that is 95% SUP, and this long boarder came from way out the back linking a wave from off the point - good for him that he managed to catch such a long ride.

My only point is this - you can't go around accusing SUPs of being big and dangerous, and then do something as potentially hazardous as flipping a 10'+ board when it is on the wave right next to you. How many ways could that board roll over and hit you hard or impale you with a fin? Karma practically demands it.

Angry old fart was clearly pissed with your drop in mate,you said it!

You also said the place is a party wave location,who made this rule up?

.So get off your high horse and swinging crap on longboarders.

Select to expand quote

Macaha said..
.So get off your high horse and swinging crap on longboarders.

You may want to remove the blinders of your horse to be able to see that this is a (quite funny IMHO) parody...

Select to expand quote

colas said..

Macaha said..
.So get off your high horse and swinging crap on longboarders.

You may want to remove the blinders of your horse to be able to see that this is a (quite funny IMHO) parody...

I've been around long enough to make my own judgement thank you colas.

Select to expand quote

colas said..

Macaha said..
.So get off your high horse and swinging crap on longboarders.

You may want to remove the blinders of your horse to be able to see that this is a (quite funny IMHO) parody...

LOL love it

Select to expand quote

Macaha said..

PTWoody said..
Just last weekend, I witnessed an angry old fart on a long board grab and flip the board of one of our SUP crew while they were both on the same wave. Granted the SUP surfer did technically drop in but this is a party wave location that is 95% SUP, and this long boarder came from way out the back linking a wave from off the point - good for him that he managed to catch such a long ride.

My only point is this - you can't go around accusing SUPs of being big and dangerous, and then do something as potentially hazardous as flipping a 10'+ board when it is on the wave right next to you. How many ways could that board roll over and hit you hard or impale you with a fin? Karma practically demands it.

Angry old fart was clearly pissed with your drop in mate,you said it!

You also said the place is a party wave location,who made this rule up?

.So get off your high horse and swinging crap on longboarders.

To a crawler, anyone standing up is on their high horse.

Select to expand quote

colas said..

Macaha said..
.So get off your high horse and swinging crap on longboarders.

You may want to remove the blinders of your horse to be able to see that this is a (quite funny IMHO) parody...

You're right of course. I think we all need to take ourselves a little less seriously.

Did the chick in the cafe like the way your life jacket matched your board

Select to expand quote

You also said the place is a party wave location,who made this rule up?

Pretty much everybody that surfs there, and as a distinguished and wise gentleman you'd be welcome to join the party fun anytime.

Do you have a GoPro?

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HumanCartoon said..

You also said the place is a party wave location,who made this rule up?

Pretty much everybody that surfs there, and as a distinguished and wise gentleman you'd be welcome to join the party fun anytime.

Do you have a GoPro?

No thanks,I don't do share well and if a sup surfer dropped in on me he is going to wear a bruise.

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Macaha said..

No thanks,I don't do share well and if a sup surfer dropped in on me he is going to wear a bruise.

Cool. Blue matches my boards. And I like a little pain. As long as we agree on a safe word.

Come on,
no pics,
no video,
it didn't happen!

looking like P4L had a short life surrounded by slashing SUP foils. RIP

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LateStarter said..

Pr0ne4Lyfe said..
I had a harrowing experience at MY local on Sunday....

Sarcasm, the lowest form of wit. :)

"But the highest form of intelligence" Oscar Wilde

Drew them in like flies on a prone surfers breath