Its tough to explain.
Its not like acid
Its a bit like if your left arm just started doing **** on its own grabbing things moveing stuff etc but you didnt want it to but you just cant stop it.
But instead of your left arm its your thoughts and thinking.
And instead of it being a thought or thinking its kind of like that feeling you get when your iceskateing and youve JUST slipped, that little entire body whole world stops split second feeling.
Acid doesnt really do that i once stayed awake for 3 days on meth when i was a teenager then my friend gave me a tab of acid and my girlfriend gave me another one not realiseing he had given me one also. This resulted in me proveing i didnt exist.
I was worried i had gone crazy cause even when i woke up a day or so later (so were talking no sleep for 5ish days) i still KNEW i didnt exist like all the thought process and how i worked it out was still there but i was unable to voice it. But i became normal after talking to a psych and they just said ahhhh yeah... your not the first one to believe this infact its been very common for centurys. There was a dude called phyrros ? Who had very very very simular beliefs etc this revelationa almost completely leveled me out as i stopped worrying and all i had to do to not be crazy was to just pretend to be normal for a few months and slowly but surely i became more normal again everyday.
Since then i managed to do enough acid to the point i even was hanging out with the dude who basically made all the lsd in the world stanly owsley / bear who was the band manager for the grateful dead. I happened to be building a prison nearby to his joint out at the walsh and lsd was the only drug we could avoid being tested for when entering and leaving the jail. The dogs were sitting on people for bank notes in theyre wallet haveing residue on them but never for the lsd. This was all around the same time i started kiteboarding actually.
Anyways so being crazy doesnt feel like acid at all really. Your thinking is still controllable when on acid your still actually thinking.
Being crazy feels like you cant stop or control the thinking.
If you do feel like your slipping and cant control your thoughts or theyre not intentional one the signs for me is if its a bit obsessive and compulsive (ocd) and that cycle loops. Also if your noticeing turning your tv or radio up to try not think uncontrollably but the tv volume just wont seem to turn up its like its down a hallway or further away then it is cause your thinking just keeps coming back and drowns out what your trying to focus on.
Anyways being crazy is nearly always for me is tied to sleep deprivation. Add a consistent string of only 4 hour sleeps and then add a huge trigger like fear of looseing everything you own again and having to go back to living in a tent is a great combination it turns out
The cure is ... well therapy will teach you to notice what sort of cycle your in and to spot the signs so you recognise it preferably before or during. But to actual fight the problem really you need sleep. But its very hard to sleep if you arent in control of your thoughts. So what you really need to do is burn off all your energy by running if you can walking will work also tho surfings also magic anything with high cardio will do so an ergo machine etc etc
Just do yourself a favour tho before you go out the door/window for a run make sure youve got pants on and try keep your arms beneath your shoulders and the noise to a minimum
Ill be haveing a bit of a break from seabreeze for ahwhile but i apreciate the concern etc only logged into let yas know im all good and have got friends looking out for me in the real world
Tldr sleep and cardio is the cure the "medicines" tend to make you get 1 of those but not the other but the therapy will help you control it by knowing the signs etc
hopefully im not actually getting sued
maybe ill just pretend im not for long enough i wont
One more thing because this will be increaseingly important with this "houseing crisis"
Alcohol in itself is almost definitely the easiest way to self medicate so when you see these homeless pricks drinking in park etc etc dont just think theyre alcoholics think of it as theyre self medicateing. Its really bloody hard to sleep if your going cold turkey amd its really easy to atleast get some ****ty sleep (never really get REM but sometimes deep) and it also lifts the mood etc etc the worst thing you could do is stay awake for days and days thats why iceys have that special brand of crazy. And if you do ice and drink youll find the alcohol hardly works. So yeah no ones cureing anything for anyone until people have proper sleeping arrangements. Theres a few people out there trying to help with this such as *the sleep bus* i dont think enough is really focused on this because even if your sleeping in a luxury van on side of the road you will be woken up soon as a truck drives past inches from your head at 3am 4am 5am etc etc
Houseing = sleep sleep = health but to get to sleep you gotto burn off them demons with some cardio
FormulaNova
> 9 months ago, 21 May 2024
